On the rue

If you are a French professor at the university of horror in Paris giving a class on 17th Century French Lit, Francophone Lit or French Cinema (or any other class imaginable with “French” in the title), it naturally follows that you will be unable to resist a brief treatise on American literature, film and culture from time to time. If this seems completely illogical, welcome to Paris. The more outlandishly bizarre your unchallenged statements about the US, the better.

Here are some of the facts I have learned about American culture according to French professors which will no doubt leave you with a big, “huh?”

· Ben Franklin, William Penn and Samuel Adams were Naturalist writers. And Zola wasn’t a real naturalist (I guess since he wasn’t an American politician, duh.)

· The 80s Eddie Murphy film Coming to America is an allegory to the life of Marcus Garvey.

· Political correctness in the US only exists in American universities.

· 60% of Americans support the war in Iraq (although we corrected the professor that actually 62% were against according to the last CNN poll).

· Phillip Lovecraft (gothy comic books for surly teenagers?) is a great contemporary American author and recommended reading according to my French cinema professor and he couldn’t believe that none of the three Americans in the class—all well out of their surly teens—had never read him.

· Frequently recurring experience, especially in cinema class: “blah blah blah great American film/text by [someone I’ve never heard of and not culturally important.] And the invariably following: “Oh, none of you American exchange students have ever seen/read it? Well, you need to read/see some American books/films and know your own culture.”

But this is not American Culture. This is a Weirdo French Intellectual Version of American Culture. It’s a sort of fascinating shadow culture populated by French-Canadians and what role have they played in the American national consciousness? They’re always just vaguely up north being polite, maybe even when they play hockey. This Great American Text/film was invariably written or directed by someone part French or with some sort of French influence which explains its obscurity at home. I remember that one—or possibly all—of these mystery Great Cultural Figures are named Jacques and I don’t remember their last names. They’re always men, of course.

But frankly, if it’s not Jack Kerouac, the only partially French famous American Cultural Figure I can think of, I don’t know who they’re talking about. Although he might not be obscure enough for them, I’m just waiting for one of the French professors to mention him. And call him Jacques.